the two hands of my doomsday clock
just got closer to the zipper of my pants
I know the world is going down quickly but I'm still focused on people laughing at me. It's like I never got past being teased in middle school and I get really defensive when people laugh in my face. Is that strange? Do you enjoy it? Do you tolerate it?
The other day I was talking about living above Kadota with Mika and Ritsu, they are Japanese women who work as the librarian and elementary art teacher respectively. Sometime during the conversation they brought up the Kadota point card. The thing about Japan is that every store has some type of point card and you collect points and get discounts after you spend 1,000,000¥ on toilet paper. They convinced me that I should get a Kadota point card because I live there and shop almost every day at that mess of a store.
Every time I walk up to the register I am prompted with the same question, Karudo desu ka. Which roughly means, do you have a point card? I always shake my head and mutter something but today, emboldened by my conversation with those two, I tried my best to use really poor Japanese, shitty English, and sign language to ask the guy for an application for a point card.
He looked at me, looked behind him at the other register and said something to his co-worker. They both turned, looked at me, and broke out in hilarious laughter. Oh wow, did they have a good time with that one. I think I saw one of them wipe a tear from his eye.
So in my most eloquent English I told the guys to fuck off and went home to sulk.
And here's another fun one.
I ran out of face lotion and picked out some new stuff at the pharmacy. I got home, washed my face and applied the lotion to my face. It didn't really rub in all that well and my face got kinda sticky afterwards. It started to burn after about 15 minutes so I took some water and tried to remove whatever I could.
You'll never guess what came off my face.
That's right, bubbles. Soap suds. Awesome!
I still don't have anything to moisturize my face now that I really need the lotion because I had soap caked on my face for 15 minutes.
Oh boy this is fun.
The other day I was talking about living above Kadota with Mika and Ritsu, they are Japanese women who work as the librarian and elementary art teacher respectively. Sometime during the conversation they brought up the Kadota point card. The thing about Japan is that every store has some type of point card and you collect points and get discounts after you spend 1,000,000¥ on toilet paper. They convinced me that I should get a Kadota point card because I live there and shop almost every day at that mess of a store.
Every time I walk up to the register I am prompted with the same question, Karudo desu ka. Which roughly means, do you have a point card? I always shake my head and mutter something but today, emboldened by my conversation with those two, I tried my best to use really poor Japanese, shitty English, and sign language to ask the guy for an application for a point card.
He looked at me, looked behind him at the other register and said something to his co-worker. They both turned, looked at me, and broke out in hilarious laughter. Oh wow, did they have a good time with that one. I think I saw one of them wipe a tear from his eye.
So in my most eloquent English I told the guys to fuck off and went home to sulk.
And here's another fun one.
I ran out of face lotion and picked out some new stuff at the pharmacy. I got home, washed my face and applied the lotion to my face. It didn't really rub in all that well and my face got kinda sticky afterwards. It started to burn after about 15 minutes so I took some water and tried to remove whatever I could.
You'll never guess what came off my face.
That's right, bubbles. Soap suds. Awesome!
I still don't have anything to moisturize my face now that I really need the lotion because I had soap caked on my face for 15 minutes.
Oh boy this is fun.
Devin thought this was worth your time
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