they slow-danced so the needle wouldn't skip until the room was filled with light

I've stopped shaving.

My kids keep asking about it and I've come up with the best response... I'm shedding my Catholic upbringing and I'm off to join up with a militant Islamic group.

Because of the high clouds in the sky I could tell that the wind wasn't blowing very hard so I headed out to the coast and checked all the usual spots. There was a bit of south swell in the water still and Cayucos was working well during the high-tide flow.

I paddled out and found a little peak for myself, surfed for a while and had a fun time doing so. The smile on my face diminished slightly when I realized how being right there made me perfectly happy and that it's almost gone.

The high clouds hadn't quite diminished so the sun was filtered and the water took on a dark slate hue. The wind was lightly blowing from the south-east so there was a slight bump to the water which only added to it's darkened look. With the setting sun causing a bit of a glare you couldn't see any of the details on the other surfers' faces. They were black silouettes bobbing in the grey water. All three of them looked out to sea, waiting for the next wave to hit the sandbar and jack into a brief moment of physics, momentum, and inertia. Although the water at a distance was dark, looking down I could clearly see through to the sandy bottom. As waves passed over my head, I could open my eyes in this green world and watch the turbulence punch my face and twist my body.

It was all perfect. Every last detail screamed of summer. Those long evenings surfing with friends, whistling for Kova as I got out of the water. I'd find her walking along and popping the seaweed. Kova would come bounding towards me and we'd wrestle around in the sand for a bit before J would catch just one more wave. I missed it. Right at that moment I missed all of that. I thought immediately of when I got my job at Santa Maria and I told myself that this was all it would take to keep me happy.

And it was then when I felt this pain of regret for accepting the position in Japan. For giving all of this up, for walking away. For leaving San Luis.

But I know that I have to go. I've overstayed my welcome in this little town. In a few days my college friends will graduate and I'll be left with a bunch of people my own age, everyone all coupled up and cozy at night. I think I'll go crazy here alone.

But it was wonderful out there last night. Absolutely beautiful.